Right so, I was talking to a friend of mine today. I know, some of you think I’m full of shit already because I only have bitter life-long arch-enemies and fuck buddies, But I do have a few people I am friendly with, and one of them was recently dumped. Her relationship ended. A difficult time for anyone to be sure. And was this break up in person? By phone? Answering machine? E-mail? nope. The wonderful world of technology has brought us the text message. A break up by text message. What the fuck is wrong with this country? Remember when you used to meet someone at the grocery story, and it was fate. Your eyes would meet, maybe you’d say something awkward but cute. And then exchange phone numbers? Well fuck, not me. I’m a child of the digital generation. Pixels and paxel. Viacom and Viagra. What do I need a relationship for when I can stare longly into the out of bright lights of some random internet webcam stripping for digital tips. Goddamnit, when did it become more interesting to stare at pixels then people? When did the occasionally static shock of a usb drive replace the touch of another person’s skin?
I know I know you’re all online looking for touch and companionship, and someone to take the lonliness away. But that’s just it. You and me, all of us, we’re posting in an imaginary forum. No names or faces or voices. Sure, I can be clever and cute, but you can’t hear me or touch me or taste me or look into my eyes to gage my sincerity. So what the fuck is the goddamn deal? Why is this shit so appealing?
Well that part is easy. Computers come with firewalls and anti-virus software. Relationships don’t. The firewall is the condom of our generation. Be careful waht you download, you might catch a virus.
I saw an ad for that bullshit E-Harmony crap today. 29 levels of compatibility or some such bullshit advertising. They actually had an actor posing as a client say “Because it’s to important to leave up to chance.” Really? Are we this fucking stupid? Are we this fucking desperate to define ourselves by a relationship? Who we meet and who we are attracted to and who we fuck and procreate with is something that has ALWAYS been left up to chance! Since the beginning of fucking, we have fucked those near us that suit our needs. Now we’re supposed to believe that’s to low-tech, and to find love we need a computer program? How cold and distant and technical can you make it? Love, and sex, and relationships are not matters of technology. No computer can tell me who can properly suck my penis and moan in the right way when I give her a really good round of oral sex. Computers are great. Technology is great. But I’ll tell you what… until you invent a computer that can play with my balls while letting me fuck it from behind and then cuddle with me for a few hours, I’ll settle for the checker at wal-mart.
As always, love, piece, and electric love to you all.
I remain,
-Gabriel
And here it is, your visual embolism...
